REALITY VS FANTASY
Reality vs fantasy?
Often times in BDSM fantasy Is confused with the reality of BDSM.
What is fantasy?
Fantasy is the faculty or activity of imagining things, especially things that are impossible or improbable. So when people have fantasies they don’t necessarily think they are going to come true.
What is reality?
Reality is the world or the state of things as they actually exist.
Many times people confuse the two. For example many people watch a movie such as 50 shades of Grey and believe this is the reality of how all BDSM relationships work when this is simply not true. Novels and Movies are meant for entertainment; they are not the reality of a bdsm relationship.
You wouldn't want your emotions misunderstood leading to problems that causr trauma, brcause your partner acted out a scene from a movie thinking it is the way BDSM relationships are. This can be a dangerous slope in the world when fantasy and reality are confused.
So lets apply these ideas to a BDSM relationship.
There is a lot of talking about what the sub wants and needs, and what the Dom wants and needs. What the sub and Dom are willing to do and what they would not be willing to do. What is one person's hard Limits could be another person's soft Limits.
Role play is a good way to act out your fantasies if it is done in a safe and healthy way. The use of things such as safe words and signals help to keep the fantasy not only safe, but the desires flowing throughout the play.
Fantasies in these relationships will usually look different than the reality, for an outsider it may sometimes seem as if the Dom is abusing or hurting the sub, when in fact they are giving the sub everything that person really wants and desires.
In reality away from the fantasy you want communication and understanding so you can know each other. The day-to-day things that bring people together might be boring to read about, but it's what makes a real partnership work and helps us to stay safe. We can not confuse reality and fantasy in the BDSM relationship.
Confusing Reality and Fantasy can lead to problems in the relationship so please keep the two separated and do not confuse them.
Often times in BDSM fantasy Is confused with the reality of BDSM.
What is fantasy?
Fantasy is the faculty or activity of imagining things, especially things that are impossible or improbable. So when people have fantasies they don’t necessarily think they are going to come true.
What is reality?
Reality is the world or the state of things as they actually exist.
Many times people confuse the two. For example many people watch a movie such as 50 shades of Grey and believe this is the reality of how all BDSM relationships work when this is simply not true. Novels and Movies are meant for entertainment; they are not the reality of a bdsm relationship.
You wouldn't want your emotions misunderstood leading to problems that causr trauma, brcause your partner acted out a scene from a movie thinking it is the way BDSM relationships are. This can be a dangerous slope in the world when fantasy and reality are confused.
So lets apply these ideas to a BDSM relationship.
There is a lot of talking about what the sub wants and needs, and what the Dom wants and needs. What the sub and Dom are willing to do and what they would not be willing to do. What is one person's hard Limits could be another person's soft Limits.
Role play is a good way to act out your fantasies if it is done in a safe and healthy way. The use of things such as safe words and signals help to keep the fantasy not only safe, but the desires flowing throughout the play.
Fantasies in these relationships will usually look different than the reality, for an outsider it may sometimes seem as if the Dom is abusing or hurting the sub, when in fact they are giving the sub everything that person really wants and desires.
In reality away from the fantasy you want communication and understanding so you can know each other. The day-to-day things that bring people together might be boring to read about, but it's what makes a real partnership work and helps us to stay safe. We can not confuse reality and fantasy in the BDSM relationship.
Confusing Reality and Fantasy can lead to problems in the relationship so please keep the two separated and do not confuse them.